Q: Vince Vaughn. You’ve got a new movie coming out yourself—Zoom. In the preproduction credits, your character is just called “Scientist.” Did they ever give you a name? A: Uh . . . Asshole.
Q: So you live up in Westchester?
A: Yeah.

Q: Do you like to spend time outdoors?
A: No. I like to sit in my outhouse and read Dickens. Uh, yeah. It’s absolutely beautiful. We’ve been going through the incremental stages of seasonal renewal, which is one of the very reasons that I moved my family from L.A. to here to begin with—so that my daughters would know what that’s like. I grew up this way. Smoggy and 85 is not a good example of what renewal is about. The frogs are coming out, tadpoles, pollywogs. There’s a lot of frog noises at night, a lot of making out among the frogs. I spend all my time outside. Yeah.

Q: Do you think of yourself as living in the suburbs?
A: Not at all. I felt like that in L.A. no matter where I lived. And in L.A. we lived as far as we could from town. We lived out in the Palisades, admittedly behind a gated community, but you could get—for the same price I bought this complex that we live in now where I have 12 acres—half an acre there. With a pool, a court, a large house, and a hillside with Fescue, and that was about it. And maybe a tree. And here we have 12 acres and the most beautiful foliage, it’s lovely. We’re just off the main highway, and we can’t even hear those cars.

Q: I read somewhere that you have chickens running around on your property. Is that true?
A: Yeah, and you know they’re coughing and sneezing, and I don’t know if it’s serious or not, but one went by today with a Band-Aid around its beak. We do this is just one of my wife’s sudden per menopausal concepts. I don’t know what happened but all of a sudden a chicken house was built and we’ve got 35 chickens that I don’t visit a lot.

Q: You’re not on a first name basis with the birds?
A: We were at first, a few years ago when we had less, and then we had even less than that because of various animals that would come and eat them. The hawks in the morning and the coyotes at night, and the raccoons or whatever. But now they’re sort of chained, there’s chicken wire all up and down and around their area. But we had names for them. Now nobody cares anymore.

Q: Are these freeloaders or are they laying hens?
A: They lay and they freeload. The eggs are delicious but I mean, every day we get a dozen eggs! What do you do with that? I just had lunch with Jayni, my wife, and a friend of ours, and we each had about 4 eggs with salmon and onions. We have eggs a lot. They really are delicious. Everything’s organic with us. For the last 20, 25 years we’ve never had anything toxic on our properties. And we’ve always had beautiful lawns. It’s the same with what we feed them, they’re free to eat whatever it is they want, stuff like that, we don’t give them any hormones. But the eggs are incredible, the yolks are much oranger and thicker than what you buy in the store. Quite delicious. We’re really getting somewhere now! Let’s start talking about Adlai Stevenson!