5. Hold a steady gaze
Follow the lead of alpha males and stare down your minions—er, staff. Let whomever you’re speaking to be the first to look away.

6. Forget details
Take a cue from your grandmother and occasionally lapse on rookies’ names and the particulars of employees’ personal lives. Just don’t overdo it or you’ll come off as if you’ve got a concussion.

7. Remain hard to please
Don’t channel Ed McMahon and tell everyone they’re a winner. Unless you’re stingy with your praise, it will lose value faster than the dollar under Greenspan.

8. Don’t keep pets
Make Bob your happy-hour cohort and he’ll start feeling free to call in hungover. Playing favorites is a no-win situation—you’ll be a doormat for slacker friends and a target for shafted staffers.

9. Fit your britches
If you throw your weight around too much, you’ll be pegged as insecure—or worse, a jerk. Keep the tough-guy, authoritative attitude in check—you’re aiming for top brass, not jackass.

10. Be cryptic
A terse e-mail—more William Carlos Williams than William Wordsworth—isn’t just a time-saver, it’s a mind-fuck. A three-word reply will resonate much more deeply than a lengthy treatise.