Got a minute? Comedian and first-time author David Cross explains how (and where) to read his new book, and the best way to quash a beef with the Cable Guy.
Q: I noticed that you dedicated your book, I Drink for a Reason, to yourself.
A: Yeah, I love me. I was there every step of the way. Well, there was a short period for about a month that I wasn't available, and that was frustrating, but for the most part . . .
Q: There are Internet URLs with bonus material throughout the book. Do you worry that once readers go online they'll forget to come back?
A: Well, I see this book being in a lot of bathrooms, and this is your, uh, basic in-flight entertainment. I'll have a temporarily captive audience.
Q: Is it strange reciting your own words for the audio version?
A: Well, it's boring, so I spiced it up. I had Yo La Tengo do a soundtrack for one of the stories and Les Savy Fav take over in the middle of reading a list—singing it and adding music.
Q: You've had well-publicized beefs with Jim Belushi and Larry the Cable Guy. Which one do you dislike more?
A: My experience with Belushi was personal—his repellent behavior [on the set of Destiny Turns on the Radio]. The thing with Larry was different. I said something in an interview, and he wrote a chapter in his book using me as a figurehead for the p.c. left. Then I responded to that. So that was it. His response was warranted, and I think it's way over. And I guarantee you that if we were working somewhere in fucking Baton Rouge or El Paso—even though our material would be completely different—we'd be hangin' out, having drinks.
Q: But as for Belushi, we shouldn't hold out hope for you to land an upcoming guest spot on According to Jim?
A: Oh no, I plan to do a six-episode arc loosely based on Bergman's The Seventh Seal.
Q: What's going on with your television project in the UK?
A: I'm doing a show called The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret about a guy who lies his way into a job that's way over his head. The whole thing takes place over a period of 14 days. The very first scene is a bailiff in England reading out my list of crimes, which are numerous—from harboring terrorists to possession of nuclear material and a rape kit.
Q: Sounds like a worthy follow-up to Arrested Development. Speaking of which—if the movie happens, what are your hopes for your character, Tobias?
A: Just comfortable clothes, lounging around, not covered in goo.
David Cross on Arrested Development